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@Chicago

Only in America..

ely(Ely)
本文发表在 rolia.net 枫下论坛Nothing is funnier than the truth:

1. Only in America...can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.

2. Only in America...are there handicap-parking places in front of a
skating rink.

3. Only in America...do drugstores make the sick walk to the back of the
store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.

4. Only in America...do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet drink.

5. Only in America...do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters.

6. Only in America...do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the
driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.

7. Only in America...do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place.

8. Only in America...do we buy hot dogs in packages of 10 and buns in
packages of 8.

9. Only in America...do we use the word "politics" to describe the process
so well: "Poli" in Latin meaning "many" and "tics" meaning "bloodsucking creatures".

10. Only in America...do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering.

11. Only in America...can a homeless combat veteran live in a cardboard box and a draft dodger live in the White House.更多精彩文章及讨论，请光临枫下论坛 rolia.net
(#109383@0)
Last Updated: 2001-6-22
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Replies, comments and Discussions:

  • 枫下拾英 / 心情随笔 / food shortage -lumlumq(lumlum); 2001-6-22 {496} (#109366@0)
    A world survey recently conducted by the UN posed the following question:
    "Could you please give us your opinion about the food shortage in the rest
    of the world?"

    The survey was a huge failure, for the following reasons:

    in Africa, no one knows what "food" is

    in Western Europe, no one knows what "shortage" is

    in Eastern Europe no one knows what "opinion" is

    in South America no one knows what "please" means

    in the US no one knows what "rest of the world" means
    • haha! Interesting -birdswimming(feifei); 2001-6-22 (#109371@0)
    • I LOVE the last line..damn accurate. -speed(如风); 2001-6-22 (#109374@0)
    • Only in America.. -ely(Ely); 2001-6-22 {1331} (#109383@0)
      本文发表在 rolia.net 枫下论坛Nothing is funnier than the truth:

      1. Only in America...can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.

      2. Only in America...are there handicap-parking places in front of a
      skating rink.

      3. Only in America...do drugstores make the sick walk to the back of the
      store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.

      4. Only in America...do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet drink.

      5. Only in America...do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters.

      6. Only in America...do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the
      driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.

      7. Only in America...do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place.

      8. Only in America...do we buy hot dogs in packages of 10 and buns in
      packages of 8.

      9. Only in America...do we use the word "politics" to describe the process
      so well: "Poli" in Latin meaning "many" and "tics" meaning "bloodsucking creatures".

      10. Only in America...do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering.

      11. Only in America...can a homeless combat veteran live in a cardboard box and a draft dodger live in the White House.更多精彩文章及讨论，请光临枫下论坛 rolia.net
      • This one is even better. -speed(如风); 2001-6-22 (#109392@0)
    • Another joke! -found(BeeGee); 2001-6-22 {934} (#109513@0)
      For a couple of years, I've been blaming it on iron poor blood, lack of
      vitamins, dieting and a dozen other maladies. But now I found out the real
      reason.
      .
      I'm tired because I'm overworked.
      .
      The population of this country is 237 million, and 104 million are
      retired. That leaves 133 million to do the work.
      .
      There are 85 million in school, which leaves 48 million to do the work.
      Of this, there are 29 million employed by the federal government. This
      leaves 19 million to do the work. Four million are in the Armed Forces,
      which leaves 15 million to do the work.
      .
      Take out the 14,800,000 people who work for state and city governments,
      and that leaves 200,000 to do the work.
      .
      There are 188,000 in hospitals, so that leaves 12,000 to do the work.
      .
      With 11,998 people in prisons now, that leaves just two people to do the
      work.
      .
      You and me.
      ..
      And you're sitting there screwing around with e-mail.
      • I love it. Sounds like Canada? I am working and you are the person who is laughing! haha -birdswimming(feifei); 2001-6-22 (#109620@0)
    • 哈哈哈 -bingle(bingle); 2001-6-22 (#109617@0)

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